S

Firstly, bravo for sharing. No one, as I can recollect, as ever done so before.

But in regards to the essay itself, I think you may have taken too relaxed approach. The vocabulary, in particular, seems too casual and sporadic. At some moments, you elevate your language, yet at others, you sound a bit juvenile.

However, this is just one person's initial impression. I, myself, am applying for a spot next year, as well. Good Luck!
 
@DeathDealer

*taking a bow

Yes, I can see where you're coming from. For example, when I wrote: "Mommy and Daddy's house", it was to mock myself using a child's vocab. Grown men who live with their parents should be cruely mocked, myself included, so I believe my approach had the intended effect :)
 
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You were right to share this one without being afraid. No one could have imitated it and made it a better one! I like your "childish" approach, because seriously, everyone in the film business needs to be a little naive and childish at some point, because with sober realism you won't survive in this business ;)

I like the links between your life and prospects, and the screenwriting techiques and quotes. Well done!
 
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Did you actually fabricate your recommendations? I'll be honest with you - I have a feeling no school will disregard that fact. It's fine to stretch the boundaries of the limitations set by the schools (no one wants you to be an automaton) but to completely pay no heed to the regulations? They're there for a reason. However, if you get in, I'll stand corrected.

Another thing, though when it was made The Matrix was written and directed by the Wachowski Brothers, they're now called the Wachowski siblings, as it's Lana and Andy. I don't know if you can change your essay once submitted, but it would probably help to get the names of your influences right.
 
Thanks guys!

@whinefields

Yes, they're fabricated, because, honestly, I had no choice. I want to be accepted, but if not I have my plan B that I'm perfectly happy with. I think I submitted knockout writing samples (*fingers crossed) and I hope they will make up for my deficiency.

Wachowski Siblings ... interesting, I didn't know about that.
 
"Recently, The Dark Night Rises left its subtextual imprints on my juicy psyche. Two events resonated: The stock exchange and football game scenes. The second begins with the singing of the national hymn, as if the director is communicating to the world that the United States has been reduced to meaningless distractions. This is fascinating because if trading stock constitutes the “bread” of this degenerate polis, sport, undoubtedly, constitutes its “circuses.” The Matrix and Dark Night foreshadow the type of cerebral discharge I hope to infuse within my writings at USC and beyond. Clearly, film is the preeminent instrument with which to disseminate truth, falsehood and agitprop of every formulation. I need access to this culturally sensitive apparatus, but why? Paul Schrader articulated it best, in Tales from the Script, when he commented:

“Occasionally, people do ask me about whether they should get involved in Screenwriting or film making. And I usually say, you know, If you can find any happiness and satisfaction in another field of endeavor, you should do so. Because the real reason to get involved in the arts is because you have no choice.”

Wow, just wow. One more time: Because the real reason to get involved in the arts is because you have no choice. I feel those words when my eyes close at night and when they peel in morning; when I fabricate letters of recommendation; when I read my purple poetry and assorted history books; when I think about the time I contacted NASA; when I reflect on Kate Powers' words; when I open Screenplay or the Screenwriter's Workbook; when I sacrifice my standard of living; when I introduce my parents as my roommates; when I fantasize about admission to USC; when I extract significance from story, and when I enter my writing space and reemerge with four or five pages that render me proud. I feel those words and so I can't bare the alternative ”¦

I have no choice."

That part I like. You sound serious about your pursuit, you sound competent, you are able to articulate a unique point of view.

Much of the rest of it was a little too "showy" for my tastes, but maybe they like that kind of thing. Seemed a bit long. I agree that you shouldn't have mentioned the faked rec. letters.
As somebody who's faked a lot of references throughout my professional life, the revelation that you did so never has a positive effect unless the person you're revealing it to did the exact same thing (and even then maybe not).
 
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interesting, is this really what you send out? maybe a little too brutally real, then again at the same time childlike innoncent
remind me of my highschool boyfriend
 
@Mighty

You state what is fairly true. And most of us who write/arrange for lofty essays/letters are either lying or trying to say the truth in a clever way.

So what you have written is the brutal truth, the honesty which all universities asked for. I don't agree with anyone who judges you unfavorably just because you have written this (or put up those funny fabricated LORs; I mean come on is there an LOR otherwise!).

But then since you are saying what is fairly known, what you are doing also becomes a clever tool. It can be read as a gimmick, and then I become afraid for you.

I hope the latter doesn't happen.

Certainly a film-school cannot make or break you (and I mean, 'you' personally, based on what of your writing we can read here). But since you want to go to one, I hope you do.
 
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